Sunday is.....

• a day of rest. Or is it?
• a constant attempt to keep peace. I start with music to set the tone, and with a lot of patience. Eventually the music gives way to unauthorized cartoons and video games, and the shouting of fighting children, and my patience wanes.
  
• constant strategizing. Whom to dress first? How soon before leaving? My babies can destroy themselves, the house, and the rest of the kids in a matter of minutes if I turn my head.
• a huge mess. Try as I might, I can't keep order on Sunday mornings. The kids wreak havoc on our kitchen while they eat breakfast......about 10 times between 6 am and 11. I swear I try to stuff them with their first breakfast, but they think they'll starve to death if they don't repeat the process 5 times before church! And believe me, I don't want hungry kids on my hands for the first 70-minute meeting at church.
  
• nagging, nagging, nagging. "Get dressed!" "Why don't you have your shoes on?" "Did you get your stuff ready to go?" "GET IN THE CAR!!!"
• one giant wrestling match. From the baths, which are inevitable for at least the little ones, even if they've had baths Saturday night, to the fighting on of dress shirts, vests, ties, etc, to the buckling of carseats, to the time on the bench for that first 70 minutes. If I'm not trying to hold one squirmy little one and keep him quiet, I'm holding onto 2 and reaching for a 3rd, who might be as old as 5 or 7 and should know better than to create the disturbance he/she is creating!
• physically exhausting due to the previously mentioned wrestling match.
• emotionally exhausting. Far too much frustration, disciplining, begging and pleading, questioning looks from those around us, imagined criticism from the onlookers, and beating up of myself for the loss of patience, raised voice, and complete inability to handle it all.

I take 5 kids to church by myself. Every other week, we add a sixth when we bring my stepson's 10-year-old brother. I choose to do this, so I don't feel like I have a right to complain. Then there are days like today, when I invite another mom to bring her kids to church by herself. She's been wanting to get back to church for months now, and just needs a little help coaxing the kids. (Why do I think I can help? I can't even get my own family there in one piece!) Unfortunately, it's a 6-kid day, my baby has been up all night sick and crying, my 2-year-old is up to his usual tricks, and my husband is out of town. And to top it all off, both babies fall asleep on the way to church. Of course church time coincides with nap time, and waking a super tired baby at nap time results in screaming and a very grumpy child. So can I possibly wake 2 babies and drag them into church by myself? No!

I sent the big kids in without me, meaning that I kind of abandoned the friend I was supposed to be sitting with, although it worked out in the end. But I melted down completely and had to reenter the building later with swollen, tear-stained eyes and groggy babies. I thought it might finally clue someone into the fact that I'm in over my head, but no such luck. Next week I'm in charge of sharing time. Pray for me......