Waiting

I'm going a little bit crazy. If all goes as planned, I'll be having a baby in 23 days. However, I've felt for a long time that this baby isn't going to wait around. Seriously, I've thought that for a few months now. And the closer it gets, the more I feel like he's going to come soon. The problem is that I really don't know anymore if this is mother's intuition or wishful thinking. Of course I don't want to be pregnant anymore, and of course I want to hold my little baby. I think it would be awesome to have him sleeping peacefully through our Christmas with us.

So today - getting ready for church this morning, all through church, making dinner tonight - I was pretty convinced that things were in motion and that maybe tonight would be the night. Now, that's a bad thing for two big reasons: 1) John is working all night tonight, and will still be on call every night next week, and 2) I'm only 36 weeks along right now. A little too soon, I know. Now that the kids are in bed, John is gone to work, and things are peaceful, I know that I won't be going into labor tonight and I can stop panicking/getting super excited.

Now if I can just keep from putting myself on this emotional roller coaster every day for the next 23 days. You'd think I'd know better by now, having gone through this whole baby thing several times before!