MFT #4: FlyLady

There's nothing better than a clean house. Don't you agree? I love to walk into my bedroom and see my bed made and everything in its place. And it's soooo nice to walk into the kitchen and see a clean floor, gleaming counters, and a bright shiny sink.

I decorated my house for Christmas yesterday - we even got a tree and decorated it for family night! - and I used it as an excuse to do a deep cleaning in the living room. I vacuumed under and behind furniture, scrubbed our microfiber (thank goodness for microfiber!) couch and recliner, and polished the piano and end tables. I cleaned all of the glass and every nook and cranny. Man, it feels so good!

I try to keep up on this stuff, but I've felt very overwhelmed since having Zach almost a year ago. With a baby who's been walking for a few months now and getting into EVERYTHING, and a 2-year-old who also gets into everything but has learned more tricks and can cause enormous disasters in mere moments, I've got a lot going on. I'm really struggling to keep up. Enter FlyLady.

Some of her tips are pretty elementary, but I like the routine she suggests and it really helps when you're feeling like you're in over your head like I am right now. To make it more fun, my sister Cassie is doing it with me. We're doing the beginner baby steps together and we talk and text to keep each other updated. It helps to have a partner to report to.

So I assume that most of you have your act together enough that you have no need for such things. But I have to admit, because I like to keep it real, that I don't. But I want to. I reeeeaaaallly want to. So I'm working on it. And things are getting better.

Just in case, though, give me a call before you drop by. :)

MFT #3: Bath & Body Works

I didn't go out and shop the day after Thanksgiving. I just couldn't bear the thought of fighting crowds and standing in long lines. But I did some Black Friday shopping........online. This was a first for me. But I got the same stuff - probably more selection because they're less likely to be out of stock online than in the store, at least I would think. I got the same sale prices, and free shipping. Yay for me!

My box came yesterday, full of the essentials : a new wallflower - the Christmas tree shape because it looked too cute to pass up, body lotion and shower gel, wallflower refills, and of course soaps of all different scents.

There was a time just a few years ago when I was unfamiliar with this store that is now one of my favorites. I would wander in with my sister or a friend while at the mall, but never bought anything. I didn't know what I was missing!

My favorite B&B scent is sweet pea. I have sweet pea wallflowers, soap, lotion, shower gel, and even a scentportable for my van. Maybe I have a bit of an obsession. Hey, maybe I should be getting paid for this post! (hee, hee)

So now I want to know.........do you B&B, and if so, what are your faves?

MFT #2*: Texting

John and I got new phones earlier this year. In the space of a day, I went from non-texter to textaholic. OK, that's probably an exaggeration, but I really enjoy having the option to send a text. I have to admit that I have a small case of phone phobia. I get really nervous when I have to make a phone call. Making visiting teaching appointments, for example, freaks me out. Calling around looking for a babysitter is torture! (When I was in 6th grade I needed to get a pet to keep in our classroom at school and my mom made me call a pet store to see if they carried turtles. I almost had a panic attack over it! And I will never live that down in my family. There you go - a little sneak peak into my crazy past. You're welcome.) I have no problem calling strangers at stores now, so I've come a long way. But texting takes all the anxiety out of reminding your friend you're on your way, or telling your sister you're running late. And no, I don't text while driving or during dates or family time. And you can't really make appointments or find babysitters while texting, so I'm not sure how that all ties in....

Anyway, if you don't text and you want to start, I highly recommend getting a phone with a full keyboard. It totally rocks!

* In case you're wondering, my list of favorite things is in no particular order other than whatever happens to be on my mind from day to day. And I'll try to make my future posts less random and rambling. :)

My Favorite Things #1: Creativity (Plus a Sneak Peak!)

Two years ago I wrote a series of December blog posts I called My Favorite Things - kind of a mix of November-like gratitude posts and a recap of the year's happenings that I hadn't had a chance to blog about. Well, I'm going to revisit the idea this year. I'm hoping it will get me back into the swing of blogging. I haven't been able to work blogging into my life lately and I'm really missing it!

Today my favorite thing is CREATIVITY. I absolutely loooove to mosey around a cute quilt shop and put together the perfect combination of fabrics for a new project. And I love the excitement of completing something that I made all by myself, start to finish. I'm at a point in life where I have very little time for myself. As much as I love my little ones, and I'm trying to cherish and drink in their littleness, I am in desperate need of an outlet - something that makes me feel like me. That's what sewing is for me these days. I don't have much time to do it, which is why I've been trying to get an Etsy shop up and going and it's taking me quite a while. But it IS coming. So here's a sneak peak:

My Etsy shop will feature these cute totes and wipe wallets* in a bunch of adorable fabrics. There will be a few quilted minky blankets, including this one, and eventually bibs and a few more baby items. I just have a few more things to sew up and pictures to take before I'm ready to open shop. As soon as I'm ready, I'll be hosting a giveaway on my blog. I'm so excited!!!

*I have to credit Elise for teaching me how to make the wipe wallets. I've been addicted ever since she made me one and shared her secrets. Thanks, Elise!

Also, as much as I wish I were, I am NOT a good photographer. I hope you can tell how cute the stuff is in spite of the poor quality photos. : )

I just couldn't resist....

Katelyn has fallen in love with writing stories and illustrating them. (I think they talk about "illustrations" a lot at school.) Here is one of her stories. I found it this morning on the table. I'm not sure where she gets her knowledge of eagles. I'll have to ask her when she gets home from school.

This next one requires a little explanation. For Carter's birthday a week ago, John got him a bearded dragon:

His name is Dragon - creative, huh? He is Carter's best pal (besides Katie, of course). Dragon hangs out with us while Carter plays with his Legos, plays video games, draws, etc. However, because Carer is only 5, we've had a few incidents with Dragon. Sometimes when I tell Carter to put Dragon back in his cage downstairs he forgets. Not seeing Dragon attached to Carter's shirt like he usually is, I assume Carter has obeyed me. We have always been able to find the lizard after one of these mishaps, until last night. I was out doing my visiting teaching (yeah me!) when I got a text that Dragon was missing. I returned home two hours later and he still hadn't been found. John had been combing the house, the yard, the garden, but no Dragon. I went out with a flashlight and looked for a while, then searched the house myself. When I finally gave up, I honestly felt like crying (take note of the end of Katie's next story). I never in my life dreamed I would be that sad, if sad at all, over a lost lizard. But that guy is Carter's best buddy, and in the short time that we've had him, he's really become part of the family. Here's Katie's take on the situation:

The kids were up at 5:30 this morning, and I listened to them bemoan their lost friend, promising to look outside again when it got light. Luckily, before we started the search again we noticed Dragon on the hearth in the living room. He was behind a little stuffed pumpkin, and probably had been all night. I don't know how we missed him, or how the cats missed him. I'm just so relieved! And I'm happy to have Carter's pal back. :)

Random Stuff

• Carter (5 yo): "Mom, how did Jesus make us? How did he make our skin? Did he make bread and toast it, and then put water on it so it was all skin-y?"


• Aidan, now 2, says the cutest things in his little sweet voice. He always says thank you, and excuse me when he burps. He loves to ask me if I'm OK, and he has taken to asking if he can hold me (meaning, of course, that he wants me to hold him). His sentence structure is amazing for a 2-year-old. If only he weren't driving me crazy all day every day!


• I'm severely sleep deprived. If Aidan's not keeping me awake, it's Zach (now 9 months old). Seriously, several nights a week I am up pretty much all night. Last night I slept for 4 hours straight, and today I got a 2 hour nap. This kind of sleep is unheard of! I hope it can carry me through another long week...


• My sister is going to have a baby any minute now. She's past her due date, and going crazy, I'm sure. I feel for her. And I feel for me because it will be a few months at the least before I see her sweet baby. I'm still in mourning over her moving across the country, if you can't tell.


• I'm drowning in a sea of dirty laundry. Seriously. I can. Not. Keep. Up! I did make some great strides this weekend. There may be hope for this week if I can keep it going.


• It will help that I'm done with this:

I've now done 4 batches of salsa, almost completely from my garden, tomatoes from my garden, and pears from my sister's tree. If I have enough, I'll do another batch of tomatoes, but that's it for this year. I'm proud of it, and we love the salsa to death, but it's just about done me in. Thank goodness for a mom who will drop everything to help out a daughter who's taken on too much!

• I've also been doing this.....

....and I'm dying to do more! I have several projects in the works - all gifts for people who have had or are about to have (wink, wink) babies. But I also have some new projects going. If I can get my act together, I'll be opening an Etsy store soon. I'm really excited, and I'll be launching it with a giveaway on my blog. So stay tuned! (If you're a follower of my blog, you know that this does not mean to expect anything soon. But it will happen!)

• Last, but not least, I'm grateful to have a husband who will dig in and do some dirty work when it's needed. While I napped today, he cleaned the kitchen, including the floor. If you've ever been in a room with my 2-year-old while he's eating, you know what a gross job that is! Thanks, sweetie. I think this week is off to a much better start than last......

So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodbye...

Three years ago my youngest sister Cassie moved halfway across the country so that her husband could go to law school. It was so hard to say goodbye. Luckily I was able to fly out to visit her once, and she has been back to visit a couple times a year. Her visits are sooo fun, especially since she's had two children while living away, and it's so neat to spend time with them and see our kids together. We also talk on the phone quite frequently, and I love that.

Monday night I had to say goodbye to another sister, also headed across the country so that her husband can attend law school. My sisters are definitely among my closest friends, and Stephanie is no exception. With Cassie far away, and our other sister working, Steph and I have taken full advantage of having each other close. We've dragged kids (more each year) shopping for kids' clothes in Park City and all over Salt Lake. We've tried to keep the kids occupied for countless hours of sewing, or shopping for fabric. We've shared our passion for gardening and plants and flowers. We've shared our parenting trials and offered each other understanding and empathy. I've been mourning my sister's leaving for months now, and I won't ever forget driving away, watching her wave goodbye.

I woke up this morning to the new reality of being alone. There's no possibility of a visit or a quick trip together to the fabric store. Our kids won't be playing together for a long time. I'm so excited for Steph and the adventure she has ahead of her. And I know we'll talk all the time and remain close, just like Cassie and I have. I just wish she were still here.

Looky looky

Wanna see something cute? Meet my new tote:

The materials and know-how were a birthday present from my sweet sister, Stephanie. She found the tutorial on homemadebyjill, one of my new favorite blogs. (Seriously, you should check it out!)


Now, ready for something else? Meet my new purse:

Once again, I copied Stephanie. She bought the pattern and made herself a purse, and I was so in love that I made myself one, and even used fabric from the same Moda line that she used. I know, what a copy cat, right? This project was more challenging and took much longer than the tote, which is super quick, but it was totally worth it. I LOVE taking my purse everywhere with me, and it even holds diapers and its coordinating wipe wallet (I know, I'm a nerd).

I didn't do a good job of showing it, but the lining of the tote is the same polka dot fabric as the zipper panel on the purse.

Have you done any fun projects lately?

Hi. Remember me?

Actually, I'm not sure that I remember me. In my last post I alluded to the postpartum depression I've been dealing with. Well, I'm sure you're dying to hear more about it, because really, don't we look to our friends' blogs to bring us down? Unfortunately, I don't have much else on my mind lately. Sorry.

This isn't my first experience with depression. I had a pretty big battle with it in college, and then again after my 4-year-old was born. Every time I have a child, I worry and watch for the signs and try to be pro-active so that maybe I can keep it from happening. This time, however, I could tell by my 6-week postpartum check-up that things weren't going so well.

Fortunately for you, my goal is not to give you the details of my struggle. Instead, I want to open up a discussion about guilt. I have always been prone to feelings of guilt, often without justification. I feel guilty about things that aren't even my fault. Now, for the last 4 months I've felt guilty about being depressed.

When I was a junior in high school, we moved to Utah halfway through the school year and I got to switch from early morning seminary (where we went to someones house at 6:30 am every school day to learn about our religion and study the scriptures) to release-time seminary. That meant I got to walk across the street from the school during one of my regular class periods for seminary. Yeah! I had a very charismatic and fun teacher - he kind of reminded me of Drew Carey. Although I know his heart was in the right place, he had an ax to grind, and he let us know. He had a huge issue with depression, especially its prevalence in Utah and among church members. He told us more than once that depression is basically unrighteous. He believed that if you understand the gospel and if you are righteous, and if you look to Christ for help, you cannot be depressed.

So if you combine his teachings, which I took with a grain of salt at the time and still don't really believe, with my tendency to feel guilty about anything and everything, you get my new problem: I feel incredibly guilty about being depressed.

Here are the facts: I have an amazing life. My husband is my best friend and the most supportive man and wonderful father. I love my children more than words can say and I am blessed to be able to be home with them to raise them. We have enough money to put food on the table and buy more than just what we absolutely need - just look at my closet full of cute shoes and my brand new minivan. I have in-laws and parents who are helpful and loving, and real, true friends who care about me, including my sisters, who are always there for me. So what do I have to be unhappy about? Nothing! And it does feel selfish and unappreciative that I'm unable to pull myself out of this.

So let's discuss: do you find yourself feeling guilty for things that you know deep down are out of your control, and if so, how do you stop feeling that way?

*Disclaimer*

I'm working with my doctor to deal with my depression, and I'm having more and more days where I feel like I'm going to kick this. And I really hate to come across as whining about my life. At the same time, I want to break my silence and share with my friends just a little of what I've been going through. Thanks for listening.

To My Family on Mothers Day

I love what Elise wrote about Mothers Day. It can be such a difficult day, for a lot of women, I'm sure, and for many different reasons. I'm so glad she posted the video about Nie Nie, because it made such an impression on my heart. (If you don't know what I'm talking about, you've got to go to one of these links and watch it!) As women, we get so wrapped up in looking beautiful, and in keeping a lovely home - in things that are so superficial. As moms, we have a wonderful opportunity to lose ourselves in the service of these precious little souls who've been sent to us to raise. I've been dealing with a pretty bad case of postpartum depression for the last 3 months, and I've struggled just to get through the day. I know that there are people who have far greater struggles than mine, and it helps me to be reminded of that fact. So instead of focusing on myself this year, I want to dedicate this Mothers Day to my family:

To Zach: I get to spend every few hours snuggling you when I feed you. You depend on me for your survival, and I am so in love with you that it borders on obsession. What a happy little baby you are, and everyone in the family loves you to death.

To Aidan: You are the cutest thing in our house right now, and also the most difficult. Your dad and I are amazed at your awesome, fun personality, and you bring us unbelievable joy, even though I spend your every waking moment cleaning up after you and trying to keep you out of trouble.

To Carter: You've hit a really defiant stage, and you test my patience more than anyone. But you're so smart and talented and focused. I know you're going to do something big and important someday, and I love you for being you.

To Katelyn: You are adorable, so smart, and so sweet. We butt heads because you're just like me, but you know how to melt my heart. You love to tell me that I look pretty, or that you love something I've made or done. And you're the best little helper a six-year-old could be.

To Tanner: I know that I'm not your mother, and I will never be able to replace her, but I love you like you're my own son. You're at a difficult age, dealing with difficult issues, and I'm so impressed that you always do what I ask of you. That's got to be rare for a 13-year-old, and I love it!

To My Husband: I wouldn't have my beautiful children if I didn't have you. And I couldn't be the mom that I am without you by my side. You give me the push I need to keep going, even when it seems too hard. Your love and support mean the world to me, and the kind of dad you are to our kids makes me want to be a better mom. I love you.

I feel so blessed to have my wonderful husband and children, and I hope I can hold onto this feeling and drink in the experience of being a mom with small kids. And I hope that all of you mommies out there had a great Mothers Day filled with peace and love.

For Shauna

What do you get when you combine:

• 8 cake mixes
• 3 cups of oil
• 2 dozen eggs
• 3 cups of butter
• 5 pound of marshmallows
• 20 pounds of powdered sugar
• a little bit of milk
• a few teaspoons of vanilla
• some food coloring
• ribbon
• and a pretty bow?

First you get this:

Then this:

And finally this:

Here's the cake at Shauna's reception:

And here's Shauna with her mom, my sweet mother-in-law Rose:

Congratulations, Shauna! You're an awesome sister-in-law!

* This was my first wedding cake, and will be my last unless one of my kids wants me to make them one someday. I baked all day yesterday, and started the frosting/decorating at 9:30 this morning. I had to pause a few times to feed a starving baby, but other than those breaks I worked straight through until 5:30, when we left for the reception. Wow, I can't believe it's over!!

Happy Birthday, Rose!

My sister-in-law just got married and is having a reception next week. Well, for some crazy reason she asked me if I'd make a cake for her. She showed me a few pictures of what she has in mind, and I told her I hope she doesn't regret trusting me with such a big responsibility, especially since I've never made a wedding cake before. I knew I'd need to practice, and I had the perfect opportunity when we decided to throw my mother-in-law a birthday party. For the practice cake, I simply used my 2 9-inch round pans and layered them, then frosted them with buttercream and covered them in fondant. Here's what I came up with:

I have to thank my mom for bringing me the ingredients and being my moral support as I kneaded powdered sugar into melted marshmallows for what seemed like hours. She was also great help when Aidan decided to dump a bag of powdered sugar on the floor behind me while I worked on the fondant. I learned a lot in the practice round, so hopefully the wedding cake will look a little more professional. It will be 3 layers, so it will be quite a bit more involved. I know what I'll be doing next Friday and Saturday!

And for those of you who don't have mischievous 20-month-olds running around your house, here's what happens to your beautiful cake while you're throwing in a load of laundry (luckily this didn't happen until after the party when there were only a few pieces left):

But could you get mad at this face?

Do you?

I'm sitting on my couch, using the computer we have hooked up to our TV in the living room, staring up at a screen on the mantel. My computer in the kitchen hasn't worked for weeks now. I can look at things, but I can't comment on blogs or on Facebook. I can't even post to my blog or pay my bills. I'm sure you can sense my frustration.

The weekend took its usual toll on my house, which I've been trying so hard to keep clean. I should be able to get things back in shape, but my baby has screamed most of the morning. I can't tell if it's his gums, which have been swollen and sore, or his belly, which tends to fill with gas easily, or if it's just general discomfort. But I can't seem to keep him happy. Right now he's in his car seat on the floor watching me, semi-content for a few minutes - hopefully long enough for me to finish this post. Of course, I'm risking that Aidan will destroy something while I'm not giving him my full attention. He already spent the maximum time he can stand locked in his high chair eating lunch. Guess I'd better get to the point, huh?

I'm overwhelmed. I feel like a failure most of the time. I can't seem to keep our house clean, our affairs in order, and the kids happy all at once. At least one of those things suffers while I'm attending to the others, and sometimes I'm unsuccessful in every area at once. So here's the dilemma: My husband gave me the go-ahead months ago to have a service come to help do some of the cleaning in our home. This is something I've always dreamed of, but when the option was presented to me, I immediately dismissed it, feeling like it would be proof of my failure as a mother. I can take care of things myself. I know how to clean. I don't even mind cleaning - there's something therapeutic about it, kind of like weeding. But when things are not clean, and I can't get to it because I'm running kids around town or soothing crying babies, the mess really bothers me. I hate the smudges on the door frames and the walls, the dirt on the baseboards, the cobwebs that come out of nowhere. Even when the toys and clothes are all put away, there are things I want done that I can't seem to get to. Last night I decided that today's the day - I'm calling for some quotes. And yet I've spent the morning, on the brink of a meltdown with my crying baby, paralyzed and unable to make the calls. How can I have someone else do what I should be capable of myself, even if I'm paying them?

I don't think I'm alone. Don't most of us have trouble reaching out for help? People always offer to help with the kids if we need a break, but how many of us will actually call that favor in? I want to know - do you ask for help when you need it? Would you pay someone to clean your bathrooms?

P.S. I just set up an in-home estimate for tomorrow with one company and left a message with my name and number for another.

Terrible twos already?

Carter and Aidan are almost 3 years apart, and I guess that 3 years has been enough for me to forget what having a small toddler is like. I could swear that Aidan is the most active and curious of my children so far. For months now I have spent most of my time chasing after him, trying to keep him from killing himself or the baby, and cleaning up disaster after disaster. He's at such a fun age, but is so much work! I've spent so much energy hoping that he grows out of this troublemaking stage soon that I completely forget what looms ahead. I know from experience that the terrible twos really start around 18 months, but boy did it take me by surprise when I got my first taste of it today!

I have to take full responsibility, because I chose to delay Aidan's nap just a little so that I could take the kids to the library. I put the baby in the Moby wrap and thought that I could hold Aidan's hand instead of making him sit in a stroller - I really want him to have some freedom now that he's getting older and thinks he's one of the big kids. I knew pretty much immediately that I'd made a mistake. The only thing Aidan was interested in was running away from me - out the automatic doors, behind the librarian's desk, anywhere he shouldn't be. If I tried to take his hand to guide him, he immediately turned to jello and dropped to the ground. With a baby strapped to my chest, it was very difficult to chase him, and even harder to try to carry him. But I had two kids who were choosing books, and then we had to wait a few minutes for the librarian to fix a mistake on our account. One of the nice librarians actually tried to help me, but there's not much you can do with a screaming child who is screaming hysterically and drops to the ground on contact. Luckily, I'm far past feeling embarrassed by my kids' behavior in public, but I was so frustrated that I was nearly in tears by the time we got out of there. Terrible twos, here we come!

I'm so grateful that when one child is being terrible, at least one child tries to be super good. We came home and put the baby in bed and I introduced the kids to the wonder of the Olympics. (I know, shame on me for not watching it with them sooner.) Sitting with Katie in the recliner while feeding the baby, with Carter playing next to us, we all cheered on our pick in the ski-cross competition. I sure love my kids and I'm beyond grateful to be home with them, but sometimes the challenges are almost too much for me.

More Home Improvements (why, oh, why?)

What on earth would possess a couple with a newborn and 4 other demanding children to take on a home improvement project? I could only guess that it's pure insanity (actually, for my part it's definitely insanity, but that's another story). John had Friday off, as well as Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, so we thought it would be a good time to tackle Katie's bedroom. Her room was actually in o.k. shape, but in dire need of a paint job, and new carpet, since the previous owners decided to spray-paint the walls and not bother to cover up the carpet. Her old carpet was in beautiful shaped except for the white paint around the edges.

We got a carpet remnant for a "smokin' deal," to quote the salesman, and in this case it actually was. And now that John has become an expert carpet installer, the whole thing was pretty cheap. We had to buy paint, the carpet, baseboards, miscellaneous hardware (light switch and outlet covers, new light fixture, a doorknob, nails) and we paid to rent a knee kicker for the carpet installation ($11 for the rental). It did take us the entire long weekend to complete the project, but it was actually our quickest project to date. Still, we're glad to have it done.

Here's what the room looked like before:

Here's what it looked like last night before we moved the bed and dresser back in:

I guess maybe it looks like we're moving backwards, but believe me, it's much improved. The carpet is thick and soft, and the colors are neutral and soothing. And I love the new carpet/fresh paint smell when I go in there. Katie lost the top of her bunk bed to Carter and will be gaining a new roommate - we'll be putting a crib in there for Baby Zach. I've got some fun decorating ideas that I'm excited to get going on, so I'll wait to post more pictures until there's something cute to show. (So expect more pictures sometime in 2012.)

In the meantime, I've been feeling guilty about never posting pictures of my completed bedroom. I've been holding off because I haven't done my window treatment yet, and I can't seem to figure out what to put on my dresser. But for now, I'll show you the most exciting part for me, which is my beautiful bed:

I absolutely adore it and its 11 pillows, about which I have to hear constant complaining from my husband. That's probably because they spend so much time on the floor, I'm ashamed to admit. But from what I hear, all husbands with multiple pillows on their beds like to complain about them. It's worth it to me.

Guess that's it for now. I'm working on restoring order to the rest of our house, since it was badly neglected while we worked on Katie's room this weekend. The chaos just about led to a total emotional breakdown, but I think I'm feeling better now that I've had some time to clean. Of course there's always more to do, and a baby to feed. So, ta-ta for now!

Dying to write

I really need to get back to blogging. I miss reading others' blogs and leaving comments, and having an outlet for my thoughts, with the possibility of feedback and understanding. I really need that connection right now. I'm stuck in that post-partum period of trying to find a rhythm to life with a new baby, and I'm feeling pretty isolated. One of my goals this year is to take better care of myself, which involves a lot of things, one of which is blogging more. Here's to hoping that I can make it happen. And here are some reasons that I feel guilty taking the time to blog:

• My kitchen sink is always overflowing and my kitchen floor is in constant need of sweeping and a good scrubbing
• Someone is almost always crying
• There is almost always a diaper to be changed or a mouth in need of feeding
• The last time I cleaned my bathrooms I was still pregnant
• I'm barely keeping the laundry under control - so far no one's run out of underwear, at least I don't think so...

Obviously I haven't quite figured out this new stage of life yet. It's getting better. But I've got two babies. I call them Big Baby and Little Baby. I love them both to death, but they both require a lot of work. Big Baby is teething, so he wakes up 2 or 3 times a night. He's the busiest toddler I've had yet, and he's too smart, so he spends his day trying to destroy the computer, the Wii, the PS3, or anything else expensive he can get his hands on. Thank goodness for naps! Little Baby eats every few hours and has a lot of gas, so he seems to cry whenever I'm trying to cook dinner or do the dishes. I don't think he cries all that much, but with my time being limited already, I feel like I can't get a thing done. So I've borrowed my sister's Moby wrap and I've taken to carrying him around on my chest in the evenings and trying to accomplish something.

To put an end to my ramblings..........I spend my nights going back and forth between feeding Little Baby and soothing a crying Big Baby. I'm not really sleeping much at all. The days are spent taking Katie to school and picking her up, then picking Tanner up from wrestling or play practice. Twice a week I get to drag the whole gang to Tanner's wrestling meets. Sprinkle in doctor and orthodontist appointments and grocery shopping and other errands, and things are pretty busy.

Wish me luck! I'm hoping I'll get the hang of all of this pretty soon. And hopefully I'll be back to blogging even sooner......

My Amazing Weekend

Here's why my weekend was so great:

Saturday:
My husband woke up and told me to go have a day to myself, so without a moment's hesitation I took a nice long shower, got myself ready for the day, fed the baby, and took off. I got a pedicure at a day spa, where the atmosphere was peaceful and I was pampered like the spoiled brat that I am. And then I did a little bit of shopping. I ended up trying on jeans, which I had no intention of doing for at least a few months - my new baby is only 4 weeks old, you know. But I was pleasantly surprised when the experience wasn't at all depressing, and I ended up with a cute, comfortable pair of jeans. It's amazing what a new pair of jeans can do for your mood. Putting them on this morning made me smile, and I felt like a more stylish, put-together version of myself when I dragged the kids to Walmart for our weekly grocery shopping.

I was gone for 4 hours, and my hubby would have been fine if I'd stayed gone longer, but that little break from the kids left me feeling incredibly rejuvenated. I came home smiling and laughing, with huge hugs for the kids and my sweetheart, who had managed to clean the house while I was gone! I am so blessed to have a husband who works hard, then comes home and helps out with the house and kids, and gives me time to myself as often as possible. Love you, sweetie!

Sunday:
This year we go to church from 9 to noon. While I love this schedule because of the full day left after church is over, I don't love trying to get the kids dressed and out the door that early. With the birth of our new baby, we actually haven't attempted the entire 3 hours until yesterday, so I was a little nervous. By some miracle, I arrived at church at 8:55 with 5 kids in tow. I didn't lose my temper once, even as I balanced feeding a newborn and trying to control a very naughty 4-year-old and an even naughtier 17-month-old. And then I sat at the piano in primary for 2 hours and the baby slept the entire time! I think John was shocked when we got home and I wasn't crying like I usually am after 3 hours of wrestling the kids at church. I chalk my success up to 3 things: having mostly boys, who require nothing more than a comb through their hair and some gel to look smashingly handsome; a husband who always asks if there's anything he can do to help as I'm running around like a mad woman on Sunday mornings; and a little help from above, because I'm trying to do what I believe is right by dragging my kids to church every week. :)

I hope that your weekend was as wonderful as mine!

Introducing....

Zachary Shane Bell
Born December 27th
7 lbs, 9 oz
20 1/2 inches long

There's a new man in my life, and I'm head-over-heels in love. Zachary came to us two days after Christmas, and he's the sweetest little addition to our family. Even Aidan, who isn't quite 17 months old, adores his little brother. I only hope that Zach can survive the "love" of his siblings, who aren't always as gentle with him as I think they should be.

It's been two and a half weeks, and I haven't even found the time to blog. Life is a little crazy with 5 kids. Right now I'm trying to be satisfied with just getting the kids where they need to go - to school in the morning, doctor and dentist appointments, music and dance lessons, etc - and keeping everyone clothed and fed. The house is staying reasonably clean, mostly because of my sweet, hard-working husband. But I should be straightening up right now and trying to tackle something on my gigantic to-do list. Instead, I'm taking a moment while Aidan and Zach are both sleeping to update my poor, neglected blog.

I have to admit, I'm feeling pretty overwhelmed still. Aidan is teething, and doesn't usually sleep through the night, so my nights are a juggling act. If one baby isn't awake, the other one is. John was such a huge help for the first week while he was home, but now I'm trying to take care of things so that he can work without falling asleep. There are days when I'm pretty sure I'm not going to survive, but luckily there are good days, too. I'm so sleep deprived, and still not feeling 100%. But I really love being a mom. Each of my kids is so special to me, and they bring me so much joy.

I have so much more I want to say, but the baby's ready to eat....again! At least I got some pictures on. Hopefully I'll have time to post again before he reaches adulthood.....